“Love needs to be based on character, if you know and love God you see He has a lot of character we are in love with. The best thing we can do for our spouse is to grow in character as listed in 1 Cor 13. It’s a love of choice. We choose to love God, He chooses to love us. Love of choice is the most powerful love, God calls that agape love, it’s a love that lasts, we should never settle for anything else between us and God and others. It’s a love that grows. Keep fervent in your love, allow it to stretch and strain as you watch it grow.” Wayne Corderio
unselfish, unconditional, sacrificial love, and is a love that can be given to one who is NOT worthy of it.
I think most of us grasp the concept of the Agape love that God has for us. We may not FULLY understand it but, for the most part, accept it and grasp it. What I think is a harder concept for our human minds to fully realize, and better yet implement, is how to have an agape love towards another human being. Let me break down the definition of agape for a minute; word by word:
1. disregarding your own advantages and welfare over those of others
2. not greedy
not limited by conditions; absolute
pertaining to or concerned with sacrifice
the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher or more pressing claim.
Someone who is Not Worthy
1. Someone who does not have worth or excellence; who does not possess merit; who is not deserving; who does not demonstrate excellent or virtue
2. Someone who does not have suitable, adapted, or equivalent qualities or value
Now lets look at this in the context of marriage. Most of us would probably say we love our husbands with an agape love. But do we really?
Do you always put your husbands needs above yours?
Do you ever put “conditions” on how you feel towards your husband?
Do you always sacrifice your needs and wants for those of your husbands?
Do you always respect your husband even when he isn’t worthy of it?
While I would really like to tell you that I do all those things all the time, I’d be lying through my teeth. In fact, I’m bettin’ that I wouldn’t be able to find one person out there that can say she loves with an agape love 100% of the time. Truly, I think it is impossible on this side of Glory; for that would be perfection.
However, we can make a commitment to strive for this kind of love towards our husband. It’s probably a commitment (if you are anything like me) that must be re-made daily; because we will mess up daily.
Work towards it. Strive for it. Daily LIVE for it. You will stretch. You will grow. The love you have for your heavenly Father is evidenced in the relationship you have with your husband. And the more your grow in your agape love for your husband, you can’t help but grow in your relationship with the Father.